“Lol,” I said to myself after finishing the 4th short story, “Robin and his merry men sure showed the sheriff of Nottingham a thing of 2!…” and then I began reading the 5th short story in the book, and this is how that short story went:

  “It was a sunny summer’s day, and a man happily walked down the street while whistling a merry tune!…

  Suddenly!, though, a nearby voice said, “Hello, miscreant!…

  Muahahahahahaha!…”

  And then the man turned and saw that there was a man who was beginning to throw a bunch of doughnuts at him!…

  “This is madness!…” the man said in a shocked tone of voice!; and then he tried to run away, but the person who was throwing the doughnuts had been throwing them so quickly that the man was now completely covered in doughnuts and couldn’t run because of all of the doughnuts that he was covered in!…; and so then the man tried to remove the doughnuts from himself, but for some reason the doughnuts were sticking to him and he couldn’t remove them!…; and then the man who was throwing the doughnuts said, “Don’t worry, miscreant!…

  You’ll just be going through my rehabilitation program, and then as long as you complete it you’ll be allowed to leave and return home!…

  Muahahahahahahaha!…” and then the man said, “But I’m not a miscreant!, and I don’t need any rehabilitation!…” and then the man who’d been throwing the doughnuts said, “Wrong!!!…

  But it’s not uncommon for miscreants to be in denial at first, and so hopefully we’ll be able to get you to admit to the miscreant behavior that you’ve engaged in before long!…

  Muahahahahahaha!…” and then the man who’d been throwing the doughnuts walked over to the man who was now covered in doughnuts, and then the doughnut-throwing man transported the other man over to a room, and then he removed the doughnuts from the man and then rushed out of the room and locked the door behind him before the man even had a chance to try n’ follow him!..

  Then the man went over to the door and tried to open it, but it was locked; and so then he began grumbling about how the doughnut-throwing man would’ve probably been in jail at the moment if sentencing laws were stricter, and then suddenly! the ceiling of the room that the man was trapped in opened up; and then he saw that there was a person who had a lot of arms and was carrying a bunch of doughnuts in those arms who was above him; and then the person flew down into the room and then set all of the doughnuts onto a table, and then the person said, “Hello!…

  I’m Skye!…

  And your first test is that if you eat any of these doughnuts then you’re a miscreant!; and so if I was you then I wouldn’t eat any of these doughnuts!…” and then Skye flew! out of the room, and then the ceiling closed up again; and then the man looked hungrily at the doughnuts and said, “These folks literally kidnapped me, and so I’m pretty sure that I can eat one of these doughnuts without being a “miscreant” because of it!…

  This text was taken from Royal Road. Help the author by reading the original version there.

  I mean, after all, whenever someone captures someone they have a responsibility to feed them!…; and I shouldn’t’ve even been captured since I didn’t like beat someone up or something!…” and then the man picked up the doughnut that looked the yummiest, and then he ate the doughnut, and then he happily rubbed his belly and said, “Ya know what?…

  These folks are a bunch of kidnappers who 100% belong in prison, but they sure do have tasty doughnuts!…” and then suddenly! the door to the room was opened, and then a woman walked into the room and said, “Hello…

  My name is officer Rose, and the Dreaded Doughnut Dropper has asked me to try n’ rehabilitate you…

  And so what miscreant behavior are you going to admit to?…

  Because, after all, we can’t proceed with your rehabilitation unless we know what kind of miscreant behavior you’ve engaged in…” and then the man said, “Hey, Rose!…

  I’m Pete!…

  And I gobbled up one of the doughnuts that Skye just brought into this room, and so I guess that’s miscreant behavior from your perspective, right?…” and then Rose groaned and said, “Why would you do that?…

  I mean, didn’t Skye warn you not to eat any of those doughnuts?…” and then Pete said, “She did indeed, but I figured that when folks are captured it’s the responsibility of the captors to feed them!…” and then Rose said, “That’s true, but there’s food in the cupboards that you could’ve eaten instead!…” and then Rose opened up some of the cupboards and revealed that there was lots of food stored inside of them; and then Pete said, “Well, I didn’t know that!; and, also, y’all shouldn’t’ve even captured me in the first place; and so I refuse to apologize for eating that doughnut!…” and then Rose said, “But the only reason why you’re refusing to apologize is because you don’t realize that every rose has its thorn!…” and then Pete began to look a bit worried; and then he said, “And so was the doughnut like poisoned or something?…” and then Rose shook her head and said, “It wasn’t poisoned, but there was a potion that was mixed into the doughnut that will make it so that you can’t leave this room for an entire year!…

  I mean, just go ahead and try!…” and then Rose walked out of the room and held the door open for Pete; and then Pete tried to walk out of the room, but for some reason he wasn’t able to walk through the open door!…; and so then he said, “Dammit!…

  A whole year?…

  And is there any sort of reversal potion that I can take?…” and then Rose shook her head and said, “Nope…

  And so you’ll just have to remain in here for a year, and then we’ll see whether you’re sufficiently rehabilitated once the year of waiting for the potion to wear off has been completed…” and then she closed the door; and then Pete began grumbling about how he was now stuck with these villains for an entire year!…; and then eventually the year had passed, and then the ceiling opened up and Skye flew down to him and said, “Good news!…

  You get to go home now!…” and then Skye picked him up; and then he grumbled all the way home about how he shouldn’t’ve been held hostage for a year in the first place!; and then Skye dropped him off in his home town; and then Skye said, “Farewell!…” and then he said, “Stop kidnapping people!…” and then Skye flew away, and then Pete walked home to his abode; and then he called the police and told them about what had happened; and he hadn’t been sure if the police would believe him or not, but the police officers said that they’d received similar reports from other people and that they believed that what he was telling them was true; and then Pete thanked the officers and said that they could contact him if they ever had any more questions; and then now that the phone call was over Pete began relaxing and reading his favorite book on his couch, and he really hoped that the police officers would capture all of those villains and that the rest of his life would be very nice and peaceful and that he would live happily ever after!…

  The End”