In a dark, damp room, four of us suddenly crashed onto hard, cracked tiles.
Pain shot through my body. It was nothing compared to my mom’s ass-whooping, but it still stung.
I pushed myself off the ground, confused by how humid and grassy the air felt.
The other three groaned as they stood. The first to speak was my cousin.
“What the fuck?”
Despite the situation, I felt a strange sense of relief hearing his voice. If I was going to hell for whatever reason, that bastard had to come with me. It was non-negotiable.
“Josh, that you, man?”
That voice definitely belonged to the dumbass, Yasin.
“Oh. So we got kidnapped? Holy fuck. You were supposed to stop me from drinking too much!”
If there had been even a spark of light in that place, Valina would have already been charging at Josh with the fury of a mad god.
I decided to speak. “I’m here too. And honestly, if anyone has the right to complain about not being stopped from drinking, it’s me.”
“Lumine!” Josh exclaimed. “Where the hell are you, little cuz?”
“A little distance away from you.”
“Yeah, but where—”
“So you can lift me in the air like I’m a child?” I asked.
“I mean… you’re what, fifteen?”
“Sixteen.” I felt a small spike of irritation. He always did that.
“Yeah… you’re still a kid, man.”
“And you let me drink like a divorced father!” I snapped. Carib, Kubuli, Stan, Markinson, Red Cap, vodka—my stomach was practically a brewery.
“I didn’t do shit,” he said dismissively. “I stopped you every time I caught you trying that nonsense.” Then he changed the subject. “But seriously… where are we?”
“Clearly we were kidnapped and thrown into a dungeon. We’re probably going to be trafficked.”
I thought about it for a moment.
“Think they’ll let me go since I’m clearly a chi—”
The thought died in my throat.
Valina chuckled. “Better get ready to commit suicide. You’re selling first.”
“Fuck that,” I muttered.
I ruffled my hair, panic creeping in. Half an hour earlier, we had been partying like there was no tomorrow.
The three of them had just finished college and were celebrating with their close friends.
I was still in high school, so technically I shouldn’t have been there. But Josh knew I wanted to come. I followed him everywhere, and I loved having fun, so… I went.
I remembered we were playing dominoes. I had won for the first time and celebrated by downing a full glass of sorrel rum punch.
After that, everyone drank. And drank. And drank.
Of course, I had to drink in secret. Josh would have lost his mind if he caught me. My parents trusted him for a reason.
Then we got into Josh’s tiny car to head home.
That was the last thing I remembered.
Yasin suddenly spoke. “You think we got into an accident and ended up in the real afterlife? Just… darkness?”
Then a booming sound echoed above us, like speakers suddenly coming to life.
“Reality Defenders have been summoned!”
“Who the fuck is that?” Yasin asked.
“You mean those?” I said. “Since it’s defenders?”
“Yeah, yeah. Did you just learn what plurality is, smartass?”
“Reality Defenders have been summoned!”
“…See? You were clearly wrong,” I shouted.
I could almost feel him shaking his head. “This is why you have no friends.”
Now, most of the time, I was a calm and rational person. If someone insulted me, I would politely ask why they felt the need to do that.
Yeah… that was complete bullshit.
“Reality Defenders have been summoned!”
“Boy, go suck your mothe—”
“Relax, Lumine,” Josh interrupted.
“Well tell him to stop lying on me! Actually, you know what, Josh? You’re right. Why should I let a Pokémon fucker ruin my day?”
“Reality Defenders have been summoned!”
Yasin fired back instantly. “First of all, I don’t lie. Second… you’re acting like some Pokémon aren’t hella fine. Come on. You have to agree, Josh.”
“Hell no.”
“Machamp,” Valina said calmly. “I’d fuck that. And Lucario.”
“Reality Defenders have been summoned!”
I cringed in disgust. “You people are revolting. In the right society, you’d all be hanged and poked with spears.”
“The fuck did I do?” Josh shouted.
Yasin ignored me. “But would it even be ethical… since you own Pokémon?”
“Reality Defenders have been summoned!”
“What do you think?” I asked Josh.
“I think… I’m going to ignore that question.”
It was funny hearing that from Mister Super Ethical.
“Reality Defenders have been summoned!”
By then, I was getting tired of that repeating voice. Judging by the others’ reactions, I wasn’t alone.
“Shut the hell up!” Valina screamed. “Shut up! Shut up!”
Yasin turned to her. “Valina, you used to do that voodoo stuff, right? Think you can magic us out of here? Like… poof, and we’re gone?”
She stopped yelling into the darkness and rounded on him.
“Oh my fucking lord, you never forget anything, do you? It’s been ages.”
“It’s been a week,” I said. “And you only stopped because you thought you were getting a boyfriend.”
“How are you pretty but still can’t get a man without witchcraft?” Yasin teased. “You should be ashamed.”
“Fuck off. Both of you.”
Then red balls of light flickered to life around the edges of the space.
“Huh…” I muttered. “I thought your voodoo stuff was bullshit.”
“I didn’t do that,” Valina snapped. “And I never touched voodoo. Josh, tell her to stop before I go to my witch friends and make her shit coins for a year.”
Anyone else might have been stunned by the sight before us: an ancient temple lined with statues of men and women, murals depicting ceremonies and battles.
But our conversation continued.
“You’re friends with witches?” I glared at the tall girl with long locks cascading down her back.
They were probably the best locks in existence. Anyone with half an eye could tell they’d been retwisted by a master.
I was that master.
“A ton of them,” Valina said.
Josh folded his arms, looking concerned. The muscles beneath a decent layer of fat shifted.
“Like… real witches?”
“You know I tell you almost everything.”
“How old are they?” I asked.
She hesitated.
When she finally answered, her confidence was fragile. “Like… my age. Maybe a bit older.”
We all stared at her.
Then I burst into laughter.
“Where did you meet them? Discord? #WitchesOfReddit?”
She glared at me but didn’t respond.
I kept going.
“You guys got some corny team name too? Like Witches of Dawn?”
I kept laughing—until a realization suddenly hit me.
We had mysteriously appeared in an ancient temple.
The laughter died.
“Holy fuck,” I said slowly. “We’re here because you sold our souls to the devil!”
Yasin’s eyebrows shot up.
“Holy shit!”
“Let’s kill her!” I pointed at Valina like a battlefield commander.
Yasin and I immediately rushed her.
But Josh jumped in front of her.
“Stop it! Valina would never—”
“Oh, I definitely did,” she said from behind him.
Josh froze.
He slowly turned around to look at her.
Valina avoided his eyes, craning her neck toward the ceiling while pretending to look confident.
“You… what?”
Before he could react further, Yasin shoved Josh aside and lunged for her.
Josh grabbed him and dragged him down.
I leapt forward and tackled Valina to the ground, locking my arms around her.
“Let me go!” She tried to shove me off with her knees.
So I bit her shoulder.
“You evil shit! How dare you sell my soul!”
“It’s more complicated than that, you mongrel!” She responded.
“When I kill you, we’ll see what’s complicated.”
“You wish!”
She bit my chin, and I recoiled in pain. Before I could react, she tried to shove me off her. I grabbed her neck instead, sliding my arm around it and locking her in a chokehold.
“Get… off me!”
“Tell me why you sold our souls first!” I demanded.
“I didn’t mean to!”
“Liar.”
“I got the fucking tutorial off GPT, for fuck’s sake.”
That revelation drained the strength from my arms. She slipped free and rolled away from me.
She wasn’t gasping for air or anything. I hadn’t actually been choking her—just restraining her.
“Off GPT?” I repeated.
She looked away in embarrassment. “GPT-3. How was I supposed to know it was real?”
Josh and Yasin stopped fighting and approached us.
“Wait,” Josh said. “The spell actually worked?”
“That sounds like complete bullshit,” I said.
“Yeah. It was supposed to be a joke,” Valina said. “But there was cold air, then dark mist, and then… your father appeared and started jerking off.”
“What?” I stared at her, completely blindsided.
“What? Of course I don’t know if it worked. Nothing happened. Well—nothing happened back then.”
“Don’t talk about my father like that,” I said.
“You tried to kill me. I think that earns me an abundance of dad jokes.”
She planted her hands on her hips and looked around the room like a busy supervisor inspecting a job site.
“So… let’s see what’s around. Look for a hidden door or something.”
“You sold our souls,” I repeated, still struggling to process it. “GPT gave you instructions on how to sell our souls. I bet it was to get a man.”
She gasped in outrage. “Do I look like a man-centered woman?”
Everyone answered at once.
“Yes.”
She muttered angrily, “Well… he was cute. Really cute.”
“You… lying fucker!” I shouted.
She rolled her eyes and began walking around the room, studying the cracked white tiles. Between the cracks grew pale grass that looked like tangled power lines.
I had never seen anything like it before.
At least it wasn’t trying to eat us.
Though, as soon as I thought that, I wondered if it might suddenly turn carnivorous.
The story has been illicitly taken; should you find it on Amazon, report the infringement.
The strangeness of the place didn’t dull my anger.
“Reverse it,” I said. “Reverse the deal now.”
Yasin didn’t join the argument. Instead, he called out from across the room.
“Come see this. Y’all need to see this.”
I ignored him. If it were a portal out of this place, he would have said so.
Valina sighed. “Reverse a deal with the devil? Does that make sense to you? Think for a second.”
I barely restrained myself from snapping at her.
“If you can sell it, you can rebuy it.”
“That ain’t how it works.”
“How would you know? You used a chatbox to do witchcraft. You’re an insult to witches everywhere. My granny would rise from the dead just to smack you.”
Yasin raised his voice.
“I’m serious! Come check this out!”
Once again, I ignored him.
Valina’s irritation rose visibly. “Bitch, keep running your mouth and I’ll kill your ass.”
“You’ll try,” I said, stretching out the vowels.
I wasn’t bragging, but I had gotten into a lot of fights since starting high school. I’d even been expelled from Convent High for getting into too many.
The important question was my win-loss ratio.
I almost always got my ass kicked.
Before anything escalated, Josh spoke.
“What’s done is done.”
I stared at him in disbelief. “You can’t be serious. She ruined our lives.”
He shrugged like it barely mattered. “I don’t believe her witchcraft actually worked. And even if it did… it is what it is.”
I wanted to argue. Fight him on it.
But it wouldn’t matter.
That was just how Josh was.
I’d gotten him into plenty of trouble before, and he always took it on the chin. He never really got angry at me or blamed me, even when I deserved it.
Valina was his best friend, so she received the same grace.
She didn’t say anything, but I could see the guilt in her eyes.
Josh patted her shoulder, then walked over to Yasin, who was glaring at us.
“What’s up?” Josh asked.
Yasin clicked his tongue and pointed at the murals.
The wall paintings were incredibly detailed, so fresh they looked like they’d been painted only a day or two ago.
I added, “The statues are also in perfect condition.”
“Yeah, yeah, yeah,” Yasin said impatiently. “I don’t think we’re in hell or anything like that. Look—these paintings show people with tattoos surrounding and helping a small group. Supporting them. Fighting beside them. If we were in hell, I’d expect horns and demon stuff.”
I shrugged. “Yeah, I don’t think we’re in hell either. Just somewhere weird. Three of us went from drunk to completely sober. I don’t even feel a drop of alcohol in my body.”
Josh’s expression hardened—not because of my point, but because he’d just realized I’d been drinking.
And worse, I’d gotten drunk.
Valina nodded slowly. “Yeah… that is weird.”
“REALITY DEFENDERS HAVE BEEN SUMMONED!”
“Super weird,” I added. “Sounds like something from one of those fake scary TikToks.”
Valina shook her head. “Nah. More like a Reddit creepypasta.”
“Of course you’d know all about Reddit.”
“What the fuck is that supposed to mean?”
I just smiled and shrugged before focusing on something more useful. Getting out of this place mattered more than teasing Valina.
She was still glaring at me.
“You know,” I said while searching the room for an exit, “while you’re all mad and shit, I’ll be finding a way out of here.”
Her frown deepened. Then she pointed at something so enormous and obvious I had absolutely no excuse for missing it.
An enormous door loomed ahead of us like a monument to our stupidity.
“I saw that,” I said quickly. “I was just test—”
“Shut up.”
Valina marched over and grabbed the handle.
It didn’t budge.
Trying to look casual, she pulled again.
Nothing.
“Okay… what the hell?”
She braced her feet and grabbed the handle with both hands, pulling with all her strength. Veins bulged. Muscles beneath a thin layer of fat flexed.
The door didn’t move.
A minute later, she slumped against it, breathing heavily.
“Hey… bestie… help me out.”
Josh winced. “Stop that shit.”
Still panting, she flashed him a cheeky grin.
“Wow… best best. My cutesy little bestieee.”
“Stop.”
“Cutey cutey bestie-bestie-bestie-bestie,” she sang, making exaggerated faces.
Josh rolled his eyes and gestured at Yasin. “Hurry up.”
Yasin sighed, rolled his shoulders, then bounced toward the door like the main character in a war movie.
For context: Valina was mocking him. Back when they were thirteen, he used to cling to her and call her “bestie” because she was his first high school friend.
Yasin and Josh locked eyes and nodded in perfect synchronization.
Yasin planted his hands on his hips and looked down at Valina. “Step aside, little missy. The heroes shall save you.”
I nodded silently. That was the Yasin I knew. The serious, semi-competent version of him was deeply unsettling.
Valina simply stared at him, baffled.
Yasin quickly realized something had gone wrong.
“I mean… in a cool way,” he said quickly. “Like… you know. I’m bigger than you. Heavier. Stronger… yeah. Like a prince-in-shining-armor moment. Kinda.”
She kept staring at him, her fingers trembling with rage.
Then she took a deep breath and slowly exhaled.
“Aight. Break us out.”
He watched her step aside, still trying to figure out what he had said wrong. If anyone else had said what Yasin had said, she would’ve snapped back immediately. But she knew Yasin too well to let her tongue run wild.
The two of them grabbed the doorknob and looked at each other.
Then they both got the same idea.
Josh said, “Anime shit?”
“Fuck yeah.”
Josh turned toward us and smiled.
“Rest easy, damsels in distress—”
“Kill yourself,” I cut in.
They threw their heads back in unison.
“HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!”
“HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!”
With dramatic and completely useless vigor, they twisted and yanked the doorknob like they expected divine intervention.
“This is too much! We need to use that technique!” Yasin gasped.
I folded my arms like I was watching a movie. They were clearly putting on a show for us. I wasn’t sure how to feel about it, but I was mildly entertained.
Josh’s eyes widened. “No… you don’t mean—”
Yasin lowered his voice dramatically. “Yes… I mean that.”
My interest immediately vanished. I sat down on the floor and waited for them to finish.
After a while, the screaming stopped. They both collapsed on the ground, panting.
“Holy… shit.” Josh wiped sweat from his eyes. “I think we’re fucked. Like really bad.”
Yasin lay on his back and nodded. “Yeah, we’re in trouble. We’re gonna starve. You think we could survive eating each other’s shit? Oh man… I don’t wanna do that.”
Just hearing that sent me into panic mode.
I rushed the door along with Valina and Josh, and we began pounding on it.
I didn’t care if my bones broke or if my blood painted the floor. I needed to get out of there.
Yasin joined a moment later.
“Open the goddamn door!”
“You know we’re in here, you fucking fuckers!”
“I swear I’ll kill you all!” I screamed.
We kept shouting and banging until our throats gave out.
Eventually, Valina sank to her knees.
After a moment, she looked around the room before standing and approaching a nearby statue.
She rested a hand against its stone surface.
It was a detailed sculpture of a muscular, naked man surrounded by floating, rotating cards.
“I have a big-brain idea,” she said. “We use these to open the door.”
“How?” I asked.
She grabbed the statue and tried to move it.
Nothing happened.
She circled it, poking and tugging at various parts.
Soon, I joined her, hoping to trigger some hidden mechanism.
Nothing.
Before long, we looked like a pair of shameless perverts groping a statue.
Which fit her.
Not a precious being like me.
At that exact moment, light suddenly flooded the room behind us.
Then came the deep groan of two massive doors opening.
Everyone spun toward the sound.
The door had finally opened.
A man with a powerful voice said… something. Something authoritative. Like a king giving orders.
But we had a more urgent problem.
I screeched like a vampire and shielded my eyes from the blinding light. “Close it!”
Yasin ran in circles. “Myyy eeeeyes! It buuurns!”
It felt like being thrown from a dim closet into the middle of a stadium.
The stranger looked completely baffled by our reaction.
Before he could speak again, several other voices shouted.
“You fools! Show the President respect!”
“That’s right! Who the hell do you think you are?!”
Despite wanting to recoil from the brightness, I forced myself to study the newcomers.
Their dark skin was covered with tattoos of various colors coiling around their exposed flesh.
Over those tattoos, they wore long, flowing robes that fell past their knees.
Then my stomach twisted.
One man’s arm had blue worms crawling in and out of it.
He didn’t appear to be in pain. Instead, he wielded the arm like it was a weapon.
Every other man held a staff with what looked like barrels mounted at the end.
Maybe we really were in hell.
So I came up with a quick response.
“Check your ears,” I said. “We’re the Reality Defenders.”
I had no idea what that actually meant.
But the voice in this place kept announcing that Reality Defenders had been summoned.
That had to be us.
Josh and Valina quickly caught on.
“Isn’t that why you’re all here?” Josh added. “To help us defend this reality?”
Valina scoffed and crossed her arms, radiating pure arrogance. “We were summoned from our realm to aid you, and this is the thanks we get? Does that sound right to you?”
Yasin was slower than the rest of us, so he was still trying to piece together what was happening.
I was more worried about whether our act was convincing.
I had plenty of experience lying to my parents—especially my mother—so I wasn’t worried about faking my tone or emotions.
But facial expressions were trickier.
Finally, the king spoke.
“Wait… really? How do we know you’re not impostors?”
Before I could answer, Yasin spoke up.
And the moment he opened his mouth, the three of us nearly panicked.
You see, Yasin hadn’t displayed any of his usual stupidity since we arrived here. So my earlier insults probably sounded unfair and completely out of place.
“We’re all different from you, my guy. Like, look,” Yasin said.
I didn’t like that gamble. It was the first idea that came to mind, but I also wondered whether tattoos were marks given only to people of a certain status rather than something everyone possessed.
The king considered it for a moment before speaking.
“You make a good point.”
Oh.
That went smoother than I expected.
The guards beside the king weren’t convinced.
“They could be using a Skill to hide their flow marks.”
The king hummed thoughtfully, weighing their concern. After a moment, he said, “Give us a moment.”
He stepped back, and the doors behind him were pushed shut.
Obviously, we didn’t stand around waiting.
Everyone rushed toward the door.
One of the guards smirked and slammed his hands onto the ground. Instantly, a giant green spider the size of Josh erupted from the floor.
My heart turned to ice.
Before they could accuse us of anything, Valina reacted quickly.
She began chanting nonsense words, catching everyone off guard.
The king frowned. “What the hell is that?”
“Oh, we seemed unwelcome... So I was just starting the spell to send us back home.”
His eyes widened, and he waved his hands frantically.
“No, no no! Please don’t.”
Josh immediately joined in, muttering his own stream of gibberish.
“And for punishment, we shall curse this land and its people forever!”
I started clapping and circling the chanting pair in a slow rhythm. Yasin sat cross-legged in front of us in a meditative pose.
The once-confident guards were suddenly whispering to each other and glancing around nervously.
The king hurriedly said, “Don’t! W-we believe you. After all, even the temple believes you...”
We immediately dropped the act.
“If you were drawn here because of this temple, why did you not believe us?” I asked.
He sighed, looking suddenly weary.
“It has been generations since Reality Defenders were last summoned. And they were never summoned here.”
He cleared his throat, forced a polite smile, and gestured for us to follow.
“Please, come with us. You all must be hungry and tired. We will prepare a feast and hold a celebration. Our people will be overjoyed to hear this news.”
We were in an unfamiliar place, so we had little choice but to follow along until we found a safe way to get the hell out.
Still, I wondered if escape was even possible. After all, they could summon giant spiders from the ground. I had no idea what other abilities they possessed.
Josh stepped ahead of the four of us.
“Lead the way, King... What should I call you?”
The man visibly cringed.
“President Tabanak. What about you four?”
It struck me as strange that he hadn’t given us a last name, but I didn’t question it.
Josh answered first.
“Josh Markish.”
“Lumine Markish.”
“Yasin Jno Baptise.”
“Valina Juffery.”
The guard who had summoned the spider frowned.
“What’s with the two names?”
The president nodded in agreement.
“Yes. Why?”
Yasin stared at them like they were incomprehensible idiots and looked ready to say exactly that.
Valina stopped him and answered instead.
“The second name is a family name. It's like a label for descendants and wives, I guess.”
We stepped outside the building and were immediately hit by an even brighter light.
Ahead of us stood several enormous iron spheres, each with staircases leading up to openings in their centers.
What the fuck?
The worm-armed man rubbed his chin thoughtfully.
“Oh. That’s super interesting.”
The president also seemed intrigued, but what caught my attention was the strange woman standing behind them. Her eyes sparkled with curiosity.
Then she vanished.
“What the fuck,” I muttered. “A strange woman just appeared.”
The president dismissed it casually.
“That’s Lady Shella. Don’t mind her. She’s with us.”
The spider guard remained unimpressed.
“Really? That seems inefficient. We can just look at someone’s flow marks and tell which family they belong to.”
I actually found that fascinating.
The president’s markings resembled clouds drifting across his skin, while the spider guard’s formed dotted lines.
It made me wonder how difficult infidelity would be to hide in a society like this.
But it also raised another question: which flow mark would a child inherit?
I refused to show any interest. That guy was a jackass.
Valina asked, “So if your mom fucked your dad's best friend, it wouldn't be a family secret that he had an affair?”
Yasin chuckled and slung an arm around Josh.
“Imagine your girl trying to convince you that my kid is actually yours, when everything about him screams me.”
“Fuck off,” Josh laughed.
Before the spider guard could respond in outrage, Valina added,
“What if the child has the exact same pattern as the family, instead of a little difference. Does that mean it's a child of incest? Like, everyone gotta know that your brother was more than close with your mom?”
The man stared at her with barely contained fury.
His voice cracked as he replied.
“You... have quite the imagination... don't you?”
“You have no idea. But no, I'm serious.”
The president shook his head slowly.
“You all are quite different from what I expected.”
“How so?” I asked.
“Well. I expected more noble characteristics. Not... such vulgar thoughts and language.”
I shrugged.
He clearly didn’t like that reaction.
“Tell me more about you all,” he said. “Tales of greatness?”
I suspected he thought we were frauds.
So I thumped my chest with my fist.
“Josh? He killed a dragon by blinking in its direction once. Valina, tall girl, she's called the goddess of passion. She once jump-started many dying races by sharing her undying passion with every male.”
Valina puffed out her chest proudly. Then she realized what I’d said. Her expression twisted in outrage, and Josh had to grab her before she could attack me.
Petty? Yes. But I was still angry at her.
I continued without pause.
“Yasin is considered the genius of Earth, responsible for bringing forth enlightenment in medicine, politics, ethics, and geography.”
Then I closed my eyes and smiled serenely.
“As for me? I stand above all of them. Actually, I'm high key a God, but I just want to be humble.”
The king nodded slowly, clearly confused.
“Got it...”
He absolutely did not believe a word of that.
“We were summoned for a reason,” I said.
That seemed to remind him that, at least publicly, he had to pretend to believe us.
“Yes...” he said cautiously. “May I ask what your levels are? And what Source Cards you possess?”
“Like a bunch,” I lied through my teeth.
“Yes. Can you be more specific?”
“No.”
“Oh?”
He blinked several times before nodding slowly and glancing around.
“Okay then. Perhaps we will postpone the ceremony for later. You will be given the Defenders’ base so you may rest and become accustomed to things.”
Then everything changed.
In the blink of an eye, we were standing in a living room.
That was straight-up teleportation.
Holy shit.
Unfortunately, my shoes had absorbed plenty of dust in the temple, and they were already ruining the red fur carpet.
Josh slid down the wall, completely exhausted.
“I think you overdid it with the lies.”
I definitely agreed. “Yeah. Think he believes it? Like, at least a tiny bit?”
“If he thinks we're here to save his world, probably he believes a tiny bit.”
Valina suddenly lunged at me. “You evil, little bitch!”
“A grown woman trying to box a minor, you fucking loser.” I bit down on her thumb.
“Box? I'm going to have your head as a trophy!”
We fought for a short while before splitting up and dusting ourselves off.
Yasin sat on a yellow couch and said, “So... we got isekai'd.”
I nodded. “Seems so. It definitely is so.”
Valina threw herself at Josh and grumbled. “Which probably means we died on our way home.”
Josh brushed Valina's locks out of his face, then said, “I would have remembered getting into an accident. Remember, I don't drink. Not when I got folks to look after.”
I really respected him. It was sad that I couldn't be a better cousin to him.
I responded, “What can you remember happening?”
He thought about it, then scratched his fuzzy barrel twists. “I tried leaving at 11:30, I think. Called your mom, saying we were going to drop you home at 12:30. She wanted to talk to you. I lied, saying you were out cold. But you... took the phone from my hand and asked her what she wanted. She started making noise with you. Cussing you, just saying mean stuff. That you were making my life difficult. And I guess that really hurt you. So you told her to kill herself. You hated her and, yeah. Anyway. I got everyone in the car, and we left Portsmouth and headed for Canefield. I remember just driving and driving. Then... I heard a weird voice, and that was it.”
I couldn't remember much, but I somehow knew most of the conversation I had with my mother. When she said all I did was make Josh's life difficult and asked why I couldn't just be normal, it... made my heart feel cold.
The type of ass-whooping I would've faced if I made it back home made me almost wince.
My father wouldn't have stopped her. That coward never did anything but agree with her.
I looked at Valina and said, “Thanks.”
It took a while to realize why I thanked her. She gave me a thumbs-up.
Josh was close to me, so he reached out and shook my shoulder. “You good?”
I nodded. “Perfect, even.”
Josh then said, “I'm kinda happy to be here too. Summoned as heroes? To save a world? Dude...”
He chuckled. “If we do this right, this could be our fantasy.”
Yasin saluted. “Could? My dude, I'm going to be fucking left and right. We're four in all. My dick's gonna be sore!”
I chuckled. Valina stood up and began nodding, like Yasin's statement had given her an epiphany.
“We could really be anything. Have anything.”
Josh stood up, smiling. Yasin moved closer, and I also joined. Valina waved her finger toward the ceiling and grinned like an idiot.
“I'm gonna be a queen of monsters. They definitely got monsters, right? Yeah, for sure. I'm going to have the creepy ones. Like centipedes. Oh shit. And dragons. I need to balance the creepy with the noble.”
Josh did his best to contain his enthusiasm. “Dude, imagine how badass I'm going to look with knight armor and a long cape.”
He posed with his arms folded. “Call me... the dragon slayer.” He began shadowboxing in excitement.
Valina added, “Dude dude! I need armor and a badass cape too. Like imagine me sitting on a throne, looking badass. When everyone sees me, they can't tell if I'm sexy as fuck or scary.”
Josh and she power hand-fived each other. Yasin also seemed to like what they were saying.
“How about this? Having your name chanted by the entire world? Now that rocks.”
I had my mind on something else.
“And money. So much money you don't know what to do with it.” With no one to tell you what to do with it, what you can't do.
No one.
But before that could happen, we had an issue.
“So... we have to address the elephant in the room,” I said.
“What?” Josh asked.
“We got no levels. Don't know how to check that. And the same for Source Cards.”
Yasin simply said, “System.”
He had no reaction, so I guess we didn't have a system. He then said, “Cards.”
There was a sparkle of light, which formed two rectangles. The first was a completely silver one. The second was a golden one.
I did the same thing. The two others followed suit.
I had no idea how to proceed—
Yasin opened his mouth, but I quickly said, “Wait! The gold is probably special. You have to be smart when picking it. There's probably no do-overs. So we have to go with something super overpowered.” Once we figure out how to make it work.
“Uhh... Clones,” he said.
His golden card brightened, then crackled until a new golden card was born from the old one.
It showed an image of multiple people splitting from a sitting man.
I stared at the card. First, I didn't know that was all we had to do. Second... I was certain I told him to go with something overpowered, or was I imagining it?
Valina went second.
“Holy shit. Holy shit. We can choose any power we want? Holy shit! Okay! Uhh... Monster con— No no... Transformations!”
She grinned. “All I'm missing is a white and black watch.”
I had forgotten she used to be such a massive Ben 10 nerd. I never got the appeal of that cartoon, but I spent a lot of my free time listening and making AMVs, so I couldn't judge her interests too harshly.
Still, I didn't expect her monster queen dream to be so easily overpowered. The power of nostalgia, I suppose.
Her golden card cracked and revealed a person mid-transformation into a beast.
She started clapping and tap dancing.
“Yeah yeah... It started when a spell did what it did. It gave her super powers—”
The other two joined in.
“Now she got superpowers, she's not an ordinary chick.”
She spun and punched the ground.
“Pooooweeeerr.”
Valina sat up and took in a deep breath of air. “I rock.”
Josh pointed at his card. “I got Mist Generation. Gonna increase my cool factor.”
I honestly didn't have the energy to make noise. I just wanted to cry. Josh, of all people, shouldn't have made such a foolish mistake. I said overpowered. They... did the opposite.
I grumbled and focused on myself. I wanted something overpowered, so I did that.
The golden card floating in front of me now showed a clock.
I said, “Time Stop.”
