I SLOWLY ADVANCED back to my room, My eyes felt like a fist full of saw~ dust had just been jutted right into my them, blurring up my view. I blinked rapidly, they ached, probably red, all watery and glassy, I could feel the heat rising and dissolving in them, in every case I took to blink back the hot liquid hiding in them, another weigh would right up settle. Haggard, I just let them flow, caught in a fading glimpse of diminishing objects around me, I seemed to be losing focus on them. I pulled my unruly falling hair at the left corner of my forehead back into my head only for it to roar back down, flaring in my rusty eyes. It felt stagnant like my broody mood.

  I felt myself distance to an even more further place away from him, he took the ceiling and I took the ground floor, with all the gravity jutting between the two ends, the density between us getting thicker; sometimes it felt like reaching him was like trying to get a hold of the hot gaseous burning masses in the sky; the stars. Or was it like trying to touch the sun, persuading forward even though it'd obliterated you in a second, the definition of My Dad.

  At times it really felt like I was the only one yielding to make amends, Actually I the only one yielding to make this work, like the succumb I am to him. I was self- assured about how much different we were with every sort of defiance to whom ever said otherwise, rather than two symmetrical halves, we were like two halves staring in a mirror; inverted. Water, and ice, , relatively similar, but that was all I was to him the ice that quickly lost its bond and turned back to water, to match in suit, like I was never there a mere shadow of .

  He was always the one to drift off further from everyone, he wasn't particularly close to that I knew for a certainty, he was too stoic, and for that I had nothing but sympathy for him. It was as if getting close to ANYone would evoke back unburied memories- unhealed wounds.

  And I Knew- I knew good and well a cycle that had been infused to happen to me one too many hundred times, in near proximity, he'd return, just like that, like nothing ever happened, Nothing. None. No apology,

  'Oh I'm sorry, Junior for treating you like .'

  He never did apologize. He never does. Honestly, I'm Not even sure if he knows how to, he had tossed that sympathetic side of himself into oblivion.

  When'd he ever listen? When'd he ever think to ask me for my opinion? When it came to decisions, they came in form of commands than questions, or understandable requests. When'd I ever stray away from his judgments- his words, I don't think I recall, Maybe it's because I have no memory of any of it's existing occurrences. I have tried to be the perfect son he wants me to be, the son who is enslaved to his orders to never question his rather uncalled~ for rules, to never disobey him, to listen, to trust him without fail, to put my whole hand in, to understand him even when it seemed excruciatingly unfair. And what do I get in return? Just What exactly? As if I am that to actually be put in consideration and treated justly, cared for in the slightest and- and. . . At least to be loved.

  I mean I was his son, I knew the solitude, I knew what horrid pain felt like, to lose to be crushed, to think they'd be Never a ray of sun light that'd radiate in your life, relatively a good day ever again, to pretend like you're happy and pose for everyone, to keep it all together. Just barely, I knew the feeling of wanting to push everybody away because you're afraid they'd only hurt you all over again- maybe if they knew or Not, I could and I would relate to him.

  If I was to even give him a taste of what he made me feel- abandon this so~ called trying father and son relationship of ours, My dear father wouldn't even try to make things right with me, be it, because it was forbidden for him to show humanity, instead the Obstinate man would prefer vengeance; top the hostility and do something even more worser to me just for making him touch how I'd been feeling all these years, it was as if on his covet quest to obliterate any trace of pain he illuminated hostility to all who'd reluctantly display it out on him- I know he'd hate me for it and that I knew, my heart having the soft~spot I had for him, couldn't take that, I had deep affection for him more than he'd ever imagine.

  I sighed. If this was he's way of punishing me, repeatedly, each time after time hurting me, using different methods but the same , I. Hated. It.

  Exasperated, I heard sounds that screamed with tragic pain and writhed in cold appal. All inside my head somewhat ficklely quivered in suspended fear, edging at the likeness of a strangled high pitched dry menaced cry out, almost making me jump out of my skin. As I drew closer to my room I felt the shrills get even louder, it was then when I realized that those screams of uttermost inflicted fear weren't in my head but Actual. They were coming from my room- - my eyes widen to saucers, drifting to the part of my morning I almost equivalently hated to go back to, images of that little infuriating creature flashed into my head. The strands of hair at the back of my neck flared upward.

  Hyperawareness flashed through me.

  Those screams were from Rose~ Anne, I immediately took off into my room, as my emotions of qualm switched up, so quick as a heartbeat, it almost felt like I'd have a mini heart attack right there on the spot. I bursted through my door, my gingerly eyes immediately finding her, next to my bed, her entire face quirky, this picture was the most distinct expression I'd ever seen on her; her slender face was pale with shock, her rose beige skin had turned milk white, her eyes practically screaming literal unadulterated fear, the rest of her features followed pursuit, her mouth wide open as sharp deafening screams embarked out, her hands frantically feathering in the air like she'd be taking off soon.

  I imagined the entire picture of what could have happened in those short minutes I had been gone, drawing at the fallen broom at the side of her shoe, and the proximity she had with my bed, they wasn't much to imagine, although I was still stuck on one thing; Not knowing who found who first. There was the little creature, crawling around her like some revolting bug, as she desperately tried to get it off her.

  Wavered by hesitation, my focus was at where the creature traced to; her back, neck, collarbone, face, hair, back and forth it was. It scuttled, sinking its pricky thorn- sharp nails into her freckled skin, leaving little pink~ red blemishes on were it found fortuity, it scrambled upward to her dark brown hair, ruining her neat thick morningly fresh bun. Etched with it's painful accounts, she panicked hysterically spinning around in circles, her legs kicking out in several directions, throwing her hands around herself, trying to get a hold of it.

  My mind finally pushed in the thought of me to actually do something; for my rigid body to actually make a move, that felt foreign to my stationed position. I rushed over to her, darting my eyes to get a look of where it sprinted to, I was well aware of it's imposing speed, that was as quick I'm sure enough to that of a lion lunging after it's prey. I almost got it as it darted to the further start of her hairline of her mushed up hair, unfortunately it quickly dived into her chest, inside her uniform, and I swear my hand almost reached for it there.

  Her eyes, Her almond wide eyes looked like they were about to rupture out of their sockets, her face turned bright red and she exploded, she screamed at the top of her lungs.

  My gaze dropped to the bust of her uniform, as I noticed how it moved around in her upper uniform, sliding everywhere it made space, sideways, upward, downward in there inside her tremulous quarters.

  Better question.

  '

  I felt that uneasy, nauseated feeling I got when I was in an aircraft, my legs wobbly and faint, I felt I knew although that couldn't generally justify but I felt her indignation- the distaste, the tang of fear clotting up in her lungs, the tightening of her chest, faint air escaping her nostrils, the nude feeling of helplessness. Just warying, it almost felt like I could taste her agonizing emotions. For a moment, my whole face froze, like ice, I felt my eyes flare, like they turned inside~ out, a tingle sense of electricity, my bare breath, slow and heavy, my heart thumped so loudly in my ears, my whole figure tremulous; beneath me, I felt my hands begin to quiver uncontrollably, my mind sang a vigourly cadence of murk.

  The narrative has been illicitly obtained; should you discover it on Amazon, report the violation.

  It felt like the torturous feeling she felt was running through me the closer I stood next to her, I felt like we shared it, I knew perfectly of the bitterness that went through her, was it because every cell in my entire body was pulled to concentrate in everything she felt, all the conflicting rivalry emotions, were no secret to me, it felt like I was a shadow to her, structuring itself where it could fit to her filmsy frame, was me to . . . Her.

  However, only for a moment. And the sensation left.

  The color on my face completely drained out, but it couldn't match poor Rose~ Anne's. I ashened, as thoughts traced back in of how was I going to help her, she tried reaching into her own uniform as she recoiled from me, driven to help, I followed her, just as I did, my door swung open, and Albert was in.

  Caution written all over his ominous face, his slit deep brown eyes forcefully bulged open, his frowning mouth stretched in what seemed like a silent gasp of , his wary gaze found us, just a few inches away from the opening of my balcony doors.

  ''What seems to be the problem?'' He gasped out, warily staring at me then Rose~ Anne. Her body protruding out the threshold of my balcony doors.

  ''R- RAT!'' She stuttered the words batedly, almost as a bare gasp, now practically shivering, it seemed like a bucket of ice cold water had been damped right on her, her formality was so passionately given that it actually sent lengthy shivers to my spine, I darted toward her.

  ''

  '

  I asked myself plethoraly. I made up my mind I was going for it, it was at aims in helping her if she was bothered by me poking my hand where it was blatantly not supposed to be, I'd clear it up if suggested later on, however just as I was about to administer her by shoving a hand in without wondering too far, would I say, I was too late? Or was it just good timing? I saw her hand reach deep into her uniform, and in heartbeats she finally got a grip of it, squeezed the little monster out to view.

  It happened too fast for me to even say a thing, at the moment, I felt all sorts of emotions; collectively relieved at the top of it, she had saved herself from all that ignition, no thanks to me. Shockingly got it out, and captured the little furball, this scence, felt like in one blink she had it in the next I saw it live her grip, bolt out in the direction- of out in the open of my balcony. My wide eyed gaze of terror, seeing the little creature blaze out like a meteorite, kicked off at the banister of my balcony roughly then landing to who knew where, a shriek left my lips.

  ''NOOOO!"

  My wide eyes following where it headed to as I raced to my balcony, almost lunging forward to follow it to where it fell, but that was a too~ damning~ long way cut down, I regained just barely hitting the banisters, sharply, one more movement and I'd be with it. I wielded my myself in position, my fretted eyes searching the ground for, a. . . Would~ be dead splattered creature on our immaculate spruce pavement.

  I got these murky thoughts, of giving up on it immediately, to tossing its monstrous presence out of my mind, purposely deleting it's short lived existence in my head and shrugging a shoulder in reference of '

  You had to excuse my cruel resorting, in still contemplating if it were for longer seconds, would that change a single thing in my life? Would I even be moved? Would I just shrug it off and be so heartless as to forget it's entire existence? All it's words, it's purpose- all of it? It Did sound like a plan.

  I'll get to the goodness of all of this, it was a very short lived plan, when I jolted to another screech coming from below. It was a moment of sheepish intrusive thinking.

  I took off.

  Run passed Rose~ Anne who was examining her collarbone wounds while trying to give Albert a narration of what just happened to her five minutes ago, when they both saw me bolt pass them, intensified perplexity was received on their wearily concerned faces.

  ''What's goi-" that was all Albert managed to say before I got out, no time to explain, when I scrutinized about it, what precisely was I going to let them in on?

  Tempting it just be might, but not a solution to anything. Nope. I rushed down my long hallway, to the short one, to stairs, practically missing numbers of steps as I got to our living room, turned to the mini passage and finally to our porch.

  The cool spring air hit my lungs like a wave as I soaked in the air that swayed back the hair that cloaked the left side corner of my forehead, blew backward the wavy locks, as I darted toward the right angle of our mansion, to where my room was enclosed, tracing to where I heard the Vile screams coming from, down my balcony.

  I got there, beating breathlessly, I was surprised of how much speed I equipped all for that little monster; or was it for the sake of keeping my word I wanted it to be, I knew quite at the front of my mind I didn't have the slightest shred of care for that creature, if anything were to happen to it on its own account I'd have been in my room by now instead, comforting petrified Rose~Anne but this This happened on my promise to it of safe keeping it, which was suppose to win me at least a handful of trust and to assure it I was a man of my word.

  Little dazed I just stood there, my eyes searching for where- just where I heard those shrills. I stilled, as my gaze dropped to the attribution. I felt my eyes betrayed me as I disbelievingly watched my chauffeur, Cosmon. The creature once again victimized another with its plaguing survival skills of scratching and piercing flesh. It scrambling on Cosmon's neatly crewcut aurbun hair, I didn't think- I'd defy whomever would tell me that built slick muscled in every square inch of his groomed body Hugged with a two piece black brothers suit, looking rougher than some military enforce soldier was here screaming his head off. Over. A . Creature. The. Defined definite. Size. Of. A . Little mouse (

  I could see the tang of severe indignation in his hard features, his silvery eyes screamed a fear you'd get once you meet gaze, his mouth releasing a noise that mirrored a wild bear, his hard jawline clenched, his nose twitching like a toddler's did~ dirty diaper had just been tossed in his deadly face.If I was to survey, and make a clear thought out chart of how many more of our staff feared this man that embodied with him ruthlessness, haughty and uncanny precision, sent out death threats with his promising vengeance glance, , I'd give you a ninety~ nine percent out of a hundred, that single figure who I presumed wasn't afraid would go to the very human who chose to hire him.

  I wondered whom I pitied more, the '' little creature or the big baby- even in his sheepish moments it still felt wrong to paint him out so weak- okay that goes to big tough baby Cosmon. I finally had something to tag on to every time I looked him in the eye in the first imminent shot of fear, he wasn't hard to face after this encounter. I don't think if I told Albert or any house staff member that he looked like a five year old girl panicking over a cockroach they'd believe me.

  I was surprised how straight and restrained my face was, ashened of course. But I wasn't even scoffing, mirth only took form in my eyes, at big terrifying Cosmon make a big deal out of this minor issue. Although I knew I would have reacted in a relatively similar way, but it's Cosmon we're talking about.

  Show time was over, when he finally got a hold of the creature and tossed it out, onto our lengthy grassy red rose garden, I followed the sight, as what felt like my concrete feet dipped in summer heat, were finally mobilized again, the shocked seemed to shut them down for moments. I raced inside the garden, to look for it.

  I looked down around the crispy green grass, in the shrubs, into the rose thorn bushes, hoping to see it somewhere, alive of course- maybe if I wasn't feeling like I could let what we started all go without a single care in the world, I'd actually put more emphasis in this. I still stroke a thought that I couldn't have risked explaining to Cosmon and everyone else included of what an eccentric creature was doing in my possession, if I had asked Cosmon to hand it to me after his little tantrum-

  I didn't want anyone, to know about the creature, I didn't want to answer any questions, whether asked from Cosmon or Rose~ Anne, or even Albert, in relation with it. Only I and Grandpa were to know of it's existence, No one else.

  I felt a spark in my chest, strike something of relief as I spotted a lumpy grayish thing, reflect in the bright sun glow, clobbered on the east grassy side of the garden, near to the stoney pathway, a good direct view up ahead of my wide open balcony doors, it laid there stiff and flat, I actually started to fret that it was , Truely this time. I scuttled to it, as I furrowed at it lying there, its flat face facing the heavens.

  I moved down on it. Searching for a heart beat with my eyes, even at it's death point I still felt edgy to touch it.

  ''Are. . . you. . . there? Are. . . you still. . . alive?'' I asked jittery, arching up a brow, staring as if I had just gone through what it went through in those mere terrifying minutes of what seemed like endless misery- it inflicted on those people.

  Curiously, I actually crossed if it's other unnatural gift was immortality or nine lives per say?

  I finally saw signs of life, when it's nostrils twitched and its lips parted to let out a short wail, then rested with a tiresome sigh. ''Just let me die in peace.'' Bare breathless whispers left its rosy tiny lips. Its bushy thick light garying brows still looked infuriated, It's eyes shut but still making movements with it's thick slanting razor sharp eyelashes flared too, it's little ears wiggled in the blow of the wind. It continued to whisper only this time lower. ''I hear Claudiranie call on to me, it's time for me to leave this existence. I bet you're happy to see me depart.''

  I furrowed, with much confusion on my face, I did strive to see it depart, couldn't wait actually but just not like this - - I wasn't heartless, I stared at it, my eyes slowly closing in on it as I block the sunrays from reaching it.

  ''You're so dramatic. You literally landed on Cosmon's hair-"

  It began an episode of short breaths, quivering followed by gasping really loudly.

  ''And-" I wanted to say.

  It gasped again.

  ''He basically-"

  It's gasp roughened, I now thought it was just rudely trying to talk over me to avoid listening. Why was I surprised it wasn't in the slightlest bit built on courtesy. And I sighed heavily. I couldn't get a sentence out with its dramatic fit. This was going to take a while.