Warmth came first.
Not the violent heat of spells tearing through my veins. Not the familiar ache of mana backlash. Just warmth—soft, steady, alive. It wrapped around me like a blanket I didn’t remember earning.
My eyes opened slowly.
Firelight bled into my vision, orange and gold, flickering with every snap of burning wood. The sound came next—the low crackle of a campfire, steady and patient, like it had been waiting for me.
It felt... wrong.
I took a breath and immediately realized why. Something inside me was missing. Like someone had scooped part of me out and left the space hollow, echoing. My chest felt light in the worst possible way.
I shifted instinctively, trying to sit up.
Pain lanced through me.
“Don’t.” Mei said immediately.
Her voice cut through the fog like a blade.
I turned my head. She was sitting close, knees drawn up, arms resting loosely on them. The fire carved sharp shadows across her face, emphasizing every angle. Her eyes were fixed on me—alert, calculating, tired in a way sleep doesn’t fix.
“You burned yourself dry.” she continued. “Past dry. You scraped the bottom and kept digging.”
I swallowed. My throat felt raw. “How long...?”
Across the fire, Eli answered, “Seven days.”
I looked at him. He sat on the fallen log we gathered earlier, elbows on his knees, poking the fire with a stick.
Seven days.
My fingers twitched weakly. “...Everyone?”
Mary gasped softly, like she’d been holding her breath since I woke up. She rushed to my side, nearly tripping as she knelt.
“Haruto! You’re awake! I, I kept healing you every day, I swear, Isabella helped me, we took shifts...”
Her words tangled, spilling out faster than she could control them. Her hands hovered over me, trembling, like she didn’t trust her own touch.
“I thought... I thought I lost you too...”
She broke down then, tears streaming freely. I lifted my arm with effort and rested my hand on her sleeve.
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“I’m here.” I said weakly. “I’m sorry.”
Behind her, Isabella stood quietly, hands folded at her waist. She met my eyes and offered a soft, steady smile—the kind meant to keep people from falling apart.
“You’re safe.” she said gently. “For now. Your body needed time. All of you did.”
Alex stood off to the side, arms crossed, leaning his weight onto one leg. He nodded once. “You scared us, man. Don’t do that again.”
I let out a shaky breath. “Where’s everyone else?”
Mei answered without hesitation. “Out there.”
She tilted her head toward the darkness beyond the firelight. The land stretched endlessly, quiet and scarred.
“About a hundred miles’ worth.” Eli added quietly. “They’re cleaning house.”
“Orcs?” I asked. My memory was foggy.
“Genociding. As we were supposed to.” Mei said flatly.
I frowned. “...How many left?”
“Fifty two." Eli replied. His voice dropped. “Last count.”
The fire popped loudly, sparks drifting upward.
My chest tightened. “Desmond...”
No one answered.
Mei stood. “You should see him.”
I knew what she meant.
Standing was harder than it should’ve been. My legs felt unreliable, like they belonged to someone else. Mary and Isabella immediately moved to either side of me.
“Slowly.” Isabella said softly. “There’s no rush.”
We walked just beyond the fire’s reach.
The light faded, replaced by cool darkness and quiet sand. There, waiting in the half-shadow, was a grave. Simple. Too simple for someone like him.
A mound of earth. A wooden marker. Careful carvings.
Desmond.
Mary collapsed to her knees instantly.
“I tried.” she sobbed. “I really tried.”
Her hands dug into the sand. “I healed him as fast as I could. Isabella was helping me! I didn’t stop, I swear-”
Isabella knelt beside her, wrapping an arm around her shoulders. Her voice was calm, even as her eyes glistened. “You did everything you could. No one here doubts that.”
Mary shook her head violently. “I still can’t forgive myself.”
Mei stared at the marker for a long time.
“He was a good man...” she said quietly. "Unlike me.”
No sarcasm. No edge this time.
Eli sat down on a nearby log. “I’ll write about him.” he said. “I promise. So nobody ever forgets what kind of man he was.”
My legs gave out.
I knelt at the grave, hands sinking into the sand. Tears blurred my vision, dripping onto the earth.
“I’m sorry.” I whispered. “I should’ve been faster. Smarter. Stronger.”
My shoulders shook.
Alex stepped closer. “I get it." he said softly. “Soto’s that person for me. If it were him... I’d be a wreck too.”
I wiped my face with my sleeve. “He’s in heaven.” I said hoarsely. “There’s no way God would forsake someone like him. Not a priest that loyal. That kind.”
My voice cracked.
For just a second, I imagined blood instead of tears on my hands.
I clenched my fists.
“He died... in such a way!"
Silence settled after my words.
Mary sniffed softly, wiping her face with her sleeve. “He said that guilt means you cared.” she whispered. “That it hurts because love does.”
I didn’t answer. I couldn’t.
Isabella squeezed Mary’s shoulder gently before turning her attention to me. “Desmond was always near you." she said. “Not because you were strong. Not because of your powers. But because of your limitless potential for good.” Her gaze softened. “He would be proud of what you became out there.”
I shook my head. “Proud doesn’t bring him back.”
“No.” Alex said quietly. “But it's not wrong.”
Eli stared into the firelight spilling across the sand. “Some people don’t get remembered.” he said. “They die twice. He won’t.” He tapped his temple. “I’ll make sure of that.”
Mei finally looked away from the grave. “Regret is a luxury.” she said. “But if you’re going to carry it... don’t waste it.”
Her eyes met mine, sharp and unflinching. “Get stronger.”
The wind shifted, brushing over the grave, stirring the sand.
I reached out and pressed my palm against the earth one last time.
“Nobody else will go through what you went through. I'll wipe the slate clean.” I said softly.
“All of it.”
