Chapter 14 - My Best Friend

  There was a gentle breeze in the air and the rustling of leaves filled my ears. A few fell down from the branches above and landed on the ground between me and the large, gray wolf. I picked up his musky scent, and it caused Bleddyn to stir once more in the back of my mind. But I knew I wasn’t in any danger from this particular wolf. This was Benji. My friend.

  My supernatural friend.

  I was at a loss for words. I mean, I knew what I wanted to say, but there was so much that I wanted to talk about that I had no idea where to start. We just sat there - well, I was sitting; Benji was just pawing at the earth nervously - staring at each other. I did my best to take several calm and deep breaths, but the sharp pain of my ribs kept me from fully relaxing.

  It was strange, though, seeing the small mannerisms of my friend reflected through this wolf. I could tell he was growing more anxious at my silence. Yet, I knew neither of us could adequately communicate while he was in his wolf form. When Benji whimpered again I reached out to him and he slowly padded his way toward me.

  It was confusing, knowing my friend was here now curled up beside me and leaning his head on my lap. Instinctively I started rubbing behind his ears as I would with any dog, but I found myself frowning, wondering if this was appropriate. God, Cayetana would only confirm we have a thing for each other if she saw us like this.

  We remained silent a few more minutes, just like this, before I found the courage to finally ask, “How long?”

  He lifted his head up, amber eyes looking at me. If wolves were able to look confused, then Benji had mastered it. I knew he was unable to answer me back since he was in wolf form, but I took the opportunity to just rant out while he couldn’t interject.

  “How long have you been keeping this a secret, Benji? That you were a werewolf this whole time. That my closest friend was also part of the supernatural world?”

  Quickly, he stepped away from me then looked at me as if protesting what I just said. “I don’t understand you,” I said.

  His eyes narrowed again and he huffed. As he stepped back toward his clothes, his fur seemed to melt away and the telltale sounds of bones popping instantly had me looking away. In a few moments, I heard the shuffling of clothes and leaves and when I returned my gaze on him, Benji was back to human form, clothes put on hastily.

  “What do you mean ‘how long have you been keeping this a secret’,” he growled out and then sat beside me. “What about you? Why didn’t you tell me you were a wolf too?”

  “Because I’m not-” I didn’t finish my sentence. Memory of shifting in the woods hit me like a truck. I sighed and looked away, wrapping my arms around my knees as I cradled myself beside him. “I mean... because I wasn’t a wolf before...”

  He scoffed. “Ky, I call bullshit. That’s not how being a werewolf works. We don’t just become a wolf like in movies. There’s no wolf bite of lycanthropy. It’s just... you’re a wolf. And you’re always a wolf. That’s just how it is.”

  I couldn’t meet his gaze and I knew full well that his eyes were boring into the back of my head. It was almost as if I could feel the burning there. But what he was telling me didn’t make sense to me at all. How was it that people didn’t just become wolves? I wasn’t a wolf. I mean, I wasn’t until the night of the ceremony.

  With a sigh, I struggled to say, “Humor me. Please.”

  There was a bit of rustling beside me and I figured he must have gone to his usual laid-back pose. “Fine.”

  “Let’s say... I don’t know how any of this works. That I just became a wolf the other night. How would that work?”

  Benji hesitated. “Well, first of all, wolves are born as wolves. I’ll clear that up for you now. As for you becoming one the other night... that... is weird too.”

  Now I looked back at him. “Weird? Why?”

  He shrugged. “I mean... we have been told that late-bloomer wolves are a thing, but it’s rare. Or done for reasons to protect you and your wolf.”

  “Protect me,” I repeated. “But protect me from what?”

  He shrugged again. “I don’t know. Ask your wolf.”

  “I don’t have a wolf.”

  “Of course you do. All werewolves have one. A spirit wolf. A part of our soul, you could say. Don’t you hear him in the back of your mind?”

  “But that’s... my... familiar?”

  He blinked at me for a few seconds before keeling over laughing. Hard. I didn’t understand why he found what I’d said hilarious, but I did feel a gnawing guilt in the back of my mind. For a moment I wondered why I was feeling this way but then realization hit that it wasn’t my guilt, but Bleddyn’s.

  “Bleddyn,” I growled out. “You said you were my familiar!”

  To be fair, I never said I was your familiar. You came to that assumption yourself.

  “You piece of shit! You tricked me!”

  Benji had rolled over at this point, unable to stop laughing. “You-thought-he-was-a-familiar,” he said through gasps.

  “Stop laughing or I’ll singe your fur,” I growled. I got up and stomped to the nearest tree to lean against. “Ugh, what the hell is my life now.”

  “So, your wolf is called Bleddyn?” Benji asked once he’d calmed down. “Mine is Alexander. He helps me out when things get rough or I don’t know how to handle situations.”

  “Mine doesn’t help me,” I muttered.

  Only when you’re being an ass.

  “It’s like... having an obnoxious voice in my head that won’t stop.”

  I am NOT obnoxious!

  “And there’s no way to drown it out.”

  I’ll drown you!

  Benji quashed another laugh and shook his head. “Truth be told, our elders say that our wolves are a reflection of ourselves. So if he’s acting that way it’s because ...well... you act that way.”

  “I do NOT!” I protested. But the more his words lingered in my head, the more I started to realize that Bleddyn’s mannerisms, word choice, and even comebacks were... things I would have done too. I groaned and slumped by the tree, turning to look at Benji.

  “What now?” I complained, noticing that he was looking at me with narrowed brows. As if he was thinking hard on something and couldn’t quite figure out the answer. “Benji, whatever it is, just ask me.”

  He rolled his eyes and cleared his throat. “So you were talking about familiars and shit. So... you know about magic then?”

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  “No shit. I thought you would’ve figured out I was a mage by now.”

  Now his brows shot upward. It took about five breaths before he finally started shouting out questions. “Wait, a mage?! How are you a mage and a wolf? That’s impossible! You have to be pulling my leg. Wolves can’t learn magic!”

  I shrugged. “I don’t know! I just got my focus at the Coming-of-Age ceremony and suddenly, there’s a spirit-wolf-wannabe-familiar in my head and I transformed into a wolf!”

  “Coming-of-Age ceremony?”

  I groaned. “That’s the real reason why I was gone. The Boston guild does a yearly event where mages who will be sixteen get their magic focus.”

  “So... you didn’t have a party?”

  Wow, he’s kinda dense, isn’t he?

  “You have no idea,” I muttered under my breath to Bleddyn.

  “I have no idea about what?” asked Benji, not following along with my side-remark.

  “Nothing, just Bleddyn chatting.”

  “For some reason I think that bothers me more...” He huffed and shook his head. “Do you really... know magic?”

  I looked at him, wondering a moment if he was just pulling my leg or... perhaps he was in utter disbelief of the possibility. Kind of like how I was of him being supernatural. The way he proved it was...

  “I can show you,” I said, standing up once more and giving him a weak smile.

  Benji slowly got up too, probably figuring standing was needed with what I was about to show him. I had to think on what would be the best way to convince him of my abilities. Yeah, I could put up a shield again, but for some reason that didn’t feel appropriate in this situation. I wasn’t defending myself from him. I wanted to wow him. I hated that the first idea thing that popped in my head was that pyro jackass from the cabins showing off his power. But fire...yes... fire was special. Fire was chaotic... and fire had that ability to convince any skeptic that magic could be real.

  Lifting up my palm, I uttered a few words under my breath. Channeling energy into my hand, it began to glow a silvery white, something I was starting to learn was a new trait of mine since the ceremony. Wisps of light gathered at a point just above my fingertips, the concentration becoming a vibrant light. And then with a whoosh, it ignited into a ball of flame the size of a baseball. Benji gasped at the result and I tossed the ball of fire from one hand to the next.

  “You CAN do magic!” He shouted excitedly, mouth agape as his eyes followed my juggling. “You’ve had this the whole time?”

  “Yep.”

  Suddenly, his frown intensified and his expression contorted. “THE WHOLE TIME?!”

  Oh shit.

  Benji tackled me to the ground, the fireball forgotten and fizzling out of existence. He grabbed me by the collar of my shirt and gave me a shake. My ribs hurt from his weight but I couldn’t help laughing at his reaction.

  “You mean to say you’ve been using magic on me in the graveyard all those nights we had supernatural club meetings?” he shrieked.

  “B-but... I mean... yeah!”

  “WHY!?!”

  “You were such an easy target! You believed EVERYTHING!”

  “Of course I believed everything, asswipe! I’m a supernatural creature! Things like ghosts are real!”

  I rolled my eyes. “Only if a mage or something summons them. Only specters and their like roam on their own.”

  He glared back at me. “You didn’t...”

  I held my hands up. “No! I didn’t do that! I don’t know how to and that’s beyond my scope.”

  “So Abraham Ballard isn’t after me?”

  I quashed back a laugh. “Nope. That was just me trying to scare you and ’Tana.”

  “The ouija board shit?”

  “Yes, all me.”

  “And the EMF reader?”

  “...yes.”

  He gave me a gentle punch on the shoulder and I cried in pain. Benji probably remembered that I was still injured and flinched, realizing our position. He rolled off of me and laid down beside me, the two of us taking deep breaths to recover from our laughter while staring up at the canopy of leaves above.

  I was amazed at how I felt in this moment. I didn’t mean about the pain that still throbbed in my chest or my other wounds. I meant... being able to just...TALK. To have Benji and...I suppose Bleddyn in my life now. It turned out I did have friends that I could talk to about my supernatural side. And best of all, Benji had been my friend since I moved here my freshman year. It was as if the dam of secrets I had been keeping all these years could finally be released.

  But I still had so many questions. How didn’t I know Benji was part of the supernatural world? How didn’t I realize that so many kids at school were werewolves? Were there other mages at school too? Did my parents know? More like, did Mom know?

  “Do your parents know?” asked Benji as if he’d been reading my mind.

  I hesitated before muttering, “No. They don’t know I’m a werewolf.” I knew this question was going to pop up at some point, but I had been doing my best to avoid it.

  “And they’re not wolves too, are they?”

  “They’re not. My mom is a mage. Dad is just human.”

  “Are they…?”

  I turned my head and met his eyes, giving him a hard look before returning my gaze up to the leaves. I didn’t want to hear that next question. Because if I did it would mean I’d have to entertain the idea that my life was built entirely on lies. And right now...I could only handle one crisis at a time. I bit my lip and breathed out heavily, the sound of Bleddyn whimpering in my head as he tried to comfort me.

  “So what now?” Benji asked after a while. I took a long breath before answering.

  “I don’t know.”

  “If Jake is after you it means most of the pack is aware of you now.”

  I sat up and brushed a leaf off of my hair. “What’s a rogue, anyway? You and... well basically EVERYONE has been calling me that all day.”

  Benji tilted his head and pondered my question for a moment. When he thought he had a good answer, he sat up to look me in the eyes. “A rogue is usually a wild wolf or a packless wolf. They often are lone-wolf types... but the Alpha and his council have noticed some of them working in groups lately.”

  I knit my brow. “Alpha?”

  “Ah! That’s our leader of the Greywood Pack. He and his Beta, Delta, and Gamma uphold the laws.”

  “And... you all think I’m a rogue?”

  He shrugged. “I mean... you kind of smell like one. I know you’re not... I mean... I guess you are packless... which is why you smell... weird.”

  I SMELL!? I was so busy lifting my own arms and trying to smell myself I ignored Benji snorting.

  “No, Ky... not that kind of smell! It’s like... you smell like... Hell I don’t know how to explain it... like you... just don’t belong. You smell like nothing.”

  Now I was glaring back at him. “And how does nothing have a smell,” I deadpanned.

  “I... hell, I don’t know. It’s hard to explain. But there’s just a... wrongness to your scent.”

  “And everyone in your pack thinks I’m one of those?”

  He hesitated but then nodded.

  I remembered more about what happened at school. The weird looks. The girls staring at me in English. The comments in the hallway, wondering why someone hadn’t “killed it, yet.” They were all talking about me. And then to top it all off, I got attacked in the bathroom by Jake and... his friend whose name I had forgotten.

  Benji was right... they really were trying to tear me apart.

  “Is... killing rogues the expected routine?” I asked, curling my knees closer and cradling myself once more.

  Again, Benji hesitated. “It’s how we handle things. Wolves, I mean.”

  “They... were going to kill me.”

  “...yeah.”

  I shot him a glare. “And you’re friends with them!?”

  “Ky, no! I am NOT friends with them,” he answered hastily. “They’re just... the future leaders of the pack. It’s just how we run things.”

  “It doesn’t seem right... going in for the kill first and asking questions later.”

  He had no answer to that one and looked away from me. “Don’t... mages do the same thing to witches?”

  “That’s...” Now I was the one who didn’t know how to answer. But witches were... a different story, right? Ugh, this is all too confusing; I wished I knew more. But that wasn’t important right now. What was important was figuring out how do I get out of this mess, because I couldn’t keep going to school knowing my life was in real danger. I had my magic to defend myself, but even on the best of days I wouldn’t be able to maintain a spell for too long. Even with abjuration as a focus, I still didn’t know what my limits were yet.

  “Benji, how do I fix this? How do I get my life back on track?”

  “Easy,” said a new voice. I felt my blood run cold upon seeing Jake’s haggard appearance emerge from behind the trees. “You do what all rogues do. You either get out or you die.”