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Chapter 10: Registeel’s Middle Name is Self-Destruct

  "Not bad, not bad at all. To be able to defeat a fragment of my power—even if it was only one ten-thousandth—you truly are my chosen Child of God~"

  Under the scorching afternoon sun, as she watched the bck-haired youth's silhouette fade into the distance, a tall, exquisitely curved woman leaned against the door of the wooden shack, a satisfied smirk pying on her lips.

  A wide-brimmed bck fedora was pulled low, shading her heavy-lidded, seductive eyes. Her silver hair cascaded like a moonlit waterfall, framing a cold yet intoxicatingly beautiful face.

  She wore no makeup, yet her pale, supple skin was so radiant it could stir the soul of any man who looked upon her.

  Even with her identity hidden, the raw pressure radiating from her presence revealed her true, celestial status.

  —The God of all Gods.

  Arceus pulled her gaze back, already calcuting how to ramp up the "intensity" for her Child of God.

  She'd cook up some Legendary roadblocks... maybe throw in some Mega Evolutions, Z-Moves, Dynamax, and Terastalization...

  Oh, and the Natures had to be perfect, the movesets needed to be absolutely toxic and "low-tier god" level, and the EVs would be fully maxed out.

  "I'm truly curious to see just how far my little pet can crawl~"

  Wait... why do I feel like I'm turning into a little prankster like Mew?

  Arceus spped her flushed, hot cheeks and muttered to herself.

  As the Creator who rules over all, being such a massive troll isn't exactly "godly" behavior.

  She shook her head vigorously to clear the intrusive thoughts and headed for the kitchen to grab a snack, but she stopped dead in her tracks the moment she crossed the threshold.

  The kitchen was empty; there wasn't a single crumb left on the table.

  "Are you fucking kidding me? The food I programmed to refresh every morning at 9:00 AM... where the hell did it go?!"

  A moment ter, the hungry wail of the Almighty Arceus echoed throughout the silent streets of Littleroot Town.

  ...

  3:30

  [Route 102: Petalburg City to the left, Oldale Town to the right. The first route where you can battle other Trainers.]

  "ACHOO—!!!"

  Walking along the dirt path near the tall grass, Hakuya couldn't help but let out a massive sneeze.

  "Nya~?" Sprigatito poked her head down from the top of his head, looking at her trainer with genuine concern.

  Floating beside him, Milcery also drifted closer, letting out a soft, worried chirp.

  "I'm fine, I'm fine. I probably just inhaled some of the dust from the road..."

  Feeling the double dose of affection, Hakuya waved them off, but he felt a warm glow in his chest.

  However, alongside the sentiment, his eyelid began to twitch violently.

  He spent a long time trying to figure out who could be cursing his name, but eventually, he just shook his head, assuming it was just his imagination.

  Due to the game's core code, even though he had beaten his rival, the Poké Mart in Oldale Town only sold basic Potions.

  Based on how the grass encounters worked, he'd probably need hundreds of Poké Balls to catch a high-BST Pokémon with a good Ability, so he didn't waste his st five balls. He pnned to save them until he reached Petalburg City.

  "If you're carrying Pokémon, you're an official Trainer! You can't refuse my challenge!"

  As the saying goes, when two trainers lock eyes, it's time to settle it with a battle.

  The moment Hakuya reached the first intersection of Route 102, a Youngster who had been lurking in the shade of a tree jumped out and tossed his Poké Ball.

  "Oh, it's just a Metapod~"

  Hakuya nodded and decided to let Milcery take the lead for this one.

  Compared to Sprigatito, who was already adjusted to the "Randomized Hell" difficulty, Milcery needed to grind some levels and combat experience.

  "Milcery, use Tackle."

  [Metapod's Weak Armor activated! Defense decreased, Speed sharply increased!]

  In the actual games, combined with a Weakness Policy, Weak Armor was a decent ability. Unfortunately, it had been randomized onto a Metapod that only knew the move Harden.

  After a few rounds, the poor bug could only watch helplessly as it got faster and faster, only to be smmed into unconsciousness by the little cream puff.

  "To defeat my pride and joy so quickly... I admit, it's time for me to get serious!"

  The Youngster recalled his fallen bug and unclipped a second ball from his belt.

  "I choose you, Registeel!"

  The steel titan, Registeel.

  One of the massive statues sculpted by the "King of the Toilets," Regigigas—a legendary fortress from the Hoenn region with astronomical defensive stats.

  More importantly, it was a Steel-type, which meant it likely had Iron Head in its arsenal.

  One hit from that, and Milcery would probably end up owing the game half a health bar.

  But before Hakuya could recall Milcery and send in Sprigatito, the "script" of this randomized world took a turn for the absurd.

  —Youngster sent out Level 8 Registeel.

  —Registeel used Self-Destruct! Registeel fainted!

  Milcery, completely unharmed, blinked her eyes in confusion.

  "..." Hakuya instinctively covered his face. Honestly, he didn't want to ugh, but he literally couldn't help it.

  "Ugh! Just get out of here!"

  Driven by his "NPC salt" programming, the Youngster barked a final scripted threat before running off to a corner to cry.

  [You defeated Youngster! You received 300 Poké-Dolrs!]

  "Nya~?"

  Was that guy seriously just here to commit suicide?

  Sprigatito tilted her head as she hopped back onto the ground.

  [Level 5 Milcery → Level 8 Milcery]

  [Milcery learned Baby-Doll Eyes and Helping Hand!]

  There were four mandatory trainer battles on Route 102.

  After the joke of a battle with the Youngster, the following Bug Catcher was a bit more standard. He had a Quagsire with Sap Sipper and a toxic Toxic/Recover combo that was annoying, but Hakuya eventually plowed through it.

  Until... a high-energy battle theme began to py.

  "Mister, did you just become a trainer? Then we're both rookies!"

  A little Schoolgirl with a backpack, looking like she had just finished her csses, jumped into the path.

  Appearing alongside her was the "Ultimate Green Caterpilr" that ruled the skies.

  "Motherfucker... I'm just trying to fight a random kid, not raid a goddamn Legendary's nest!"

  This difficulty was high enough to make any normal pyer quit the game in a heartbeat.

  Hakuya stared at the Rayquaza diving down from the clouds and mentally cursed the creator of this randomized mod.

  Of course, compining didn't help; once the battle started, there was no escaping. Hakuya took a deep breath and went for his "wheelchair" tactic—constant switching to trigger Sprigatito's Hero Form.

  "Sprigatito, use Bite!"

  "Nya~!"

  Synchronized with the command, Sprigatito lowered her body, her spine tensing like a drawn bowstring.

  ...

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