If it hadn’t been for the Riftguard armor, I would have died then and there.

  I had no time to react as the 150-pound cat launched at me. Its front paws slammed into my shoulders and its jaws opened wide, going for my head. A long scratch screeched across the helmet, and the visor was left slimy.

  It had taken my 90 points of armor down to 33 in one go.

  The katana was long gone. I’d dropped it upon impact. The cat went for my neck, and I did my best to shield myself as I shouted, “I’m not here to hurt you! I’m a leech, too!”

  After failing to wedge its teeth under my helmet, the big cat pulled an arm back to swat at me. Another 20 armor, gone just like that. I glimpsed the level above its head.

  45.

  Holy whale-fucking hell, I was way underleveled for this. What had I been thinking, running in here?

  “Flower! Stop!” the woman’s voice called, and suddenly she was there, pulling back on the branches of the bush I’d been hiding behind.

  The cat stopped partway through another strike, then retreated. It did ten more damage just walking off me, and Hergvor had to cast a healing spell as my Bleeder effect began.

  The cat looked up, growling in Hergvor’s direction. The woman peered that way, too. “Are you with someone?”

  “An NPC! He’s just healing me. His name is Hergvor. He’s harmless.”

  “NPC?” the woman asked as the cat nosed ahead through the brush, looking for Hergvor. “What does that stand for?”

  I blinked at her, and then I moved to sit up. Her spear was in my face the next moment.

  “Oh no you don’t. You just stay right there,” she said in a tremulous voice. “I am tripping out right now, and you shouldn’t be here. Everything is all wrong, it’s all wrong.”

  I swallowed, the spear’s point a few inches from my nose. Despite her unsteady voice, the weapon was held firm. The woman had the wild-eyed look of a drug addict about her, and I wasn’t about to take any chances.

  I spread my hands again. “Please. I’m a human, like you. I was a leech once, too.”

  “Obviously you’re human,” she said. “What else would you be? And what’s a leech? I didn’t find any of those in the river here, and even if I did, they’d be a lot smaller than you. Do you… do you know what’s going on with this place? Or, am I dreaming you, too? Oh, clusterfuffles. I just want it to end.”

  I frowned at her, uncomprehending. “What… what exactly do you think is going on right now?”

  She eyed me, then retreated a step. “Who are you?” she asked. “Are you like, my spirit guide or something? I didn’t think my spirit guide would drive a motorcycle, but the Den Mother always says that Gaea works in mysterious ways.”

  A shadow flew past behind her head, and Dave sent me a whisper.

  Fuck You Dave: Second Riftguard dead. They’ll come soon.

  Fuck You Dave: Be careful with this one. The Conduit will have taken her without her really knowing what’s happening. Then they put her in that outfit and translated her here. She’s either losing her mind, or she thinks she’s dreaming.

  Remnant: Or a third option. She thinks she’s tripping balls.

  “My name’s… Talon,” I said, because Remnant was well-known for pretending to be people he’d killed, and for trying to trick Coreless. I could actually be myself right now, and it would just look like Remnant was trying to reel this woman in.

  A case of theft: this story is not rightfully on Amazon; if you spot it, report the violation.

  “Oh,” she said. “I’m Feather, and that’s Flower. She’s my dream guide. I think.”

  I narrowed my eyes. “Um… okay, so, you think you’re dreaming?”

  She shrugged. “I must be.”

  I scanned her from head to foot again, judging her to be somewhere between 18 and 22 years old. She was skinny to the point of malnourishment, with almost no muscle anywhere on her. That told me that this girl was no leech. Leeches were non-citizens who worked in labor camps in the hopes of earning citizenship. This girl could barely lift the spear she was holding, much less handle a shovel all day long.

  And if she wasn’t a leech, that meant one of two things: she was either an anarchist, or she lived in a commune. Judging by her demeanor, I could guess which.

  “Look, Flower—”

  “Feather. The cat is Flower,” she corrected.

  Well, that wasn’t going to get confusing. “Look, Feather. I’m a non-citizen, just like you. I know it’s hard to believe, but everything that’s happening is real. You’ve been… sort of… teleported into a video game. But you can die here. If you let me Conscript you, then we can work together to—”

  She recoiled. “Conscript? I’m a pacifist!”

  I waved my hands. “No, no, it’s not like that, it’s from the game—”

  Behind me, Flower growled. That’s when I gave up.

  I sighed, deflating. “Just… take me to your Den Mother. She is here, isn’t she?”

  If there was one Coreless Tendua, then there were likely to be others. It looked like the Conduit had found some sort of hippie commune somewhere on the planet, and used them to fill the roles of the wild tribe in this forest. I couldn’t say it was a bad choice, thematically.

  Unfortunately, communes were known for their “natural” drug use, so convincing the Tendua that they had been imprisoned inside a game world by aliens for real was going to be tough. Feather already seemed convinced that she was hallucinating on shrooms, and honestly, I couldn’t blame her.

  Feather considered me a moment, then straightened. She jutted her chin out at the panther, and for the first time, I got a good look at the creature.

  It was blue. Dark blue. And it shimmered a little in the moonlight. Its eyes reflected an eerie cyan glow.

  “Flower, guard them,” Feather commanded. “If they make any sudden moves, eat them.” She stepped aside and addressed me next. “If you want to meet the Den Mother, you’ll have to go ahead of us. I’ll tell you where to turn.”

  I rose carefully to my feet, the panther growling the whole time. “Okay, but my friend, Hergvor… he’s… simple. It’s best if he just stays here.”

  “Oh, no, he won’t. He’ll go find more of you. The Den Mother says we can’t let anyone escape to tell others we’re here.”

  That was sound commune logic. Apparently this Den Mother thought it also applied to prolonged drug trips set in fantasy worlds.

  “Well, I can set him to follow me,” I said. “But you have to… be friendly with me. Otherwise, he’ll attack you.”

  My options with Hergvor were limited. I could either send him back to the wall, where he would get killed; I could leave him planted here, waiting to heal me even as I got way out of range; or I could set him to follow me, and fight whoever I fought.

  Since this woman’s name was still yellow—it read Tendua Scout, Level 35—she was technically still a mob. And she was threatening me with her pet and her spear. I was pretty sure Hergvor would start attacking her if I switched his modes.

  “I am being friendly,” Feather said. She was still pointing the spear at me.

  Fuck You Dave: Have her join your party. There should be a party menu on the right side of your HUD, above your mana pool.

  I held up a finger. “Wait just one second. I’ll invite you to my party. Hold on.”

  To my surprise, she waited without a word while I opened the Party menu. On first tap, my party members appeared along the right side of the screen: one was a small image of Dave’s head, and another was an anonymous face icon indicating FATE. Apparently, they both counted as my party members, while Hergvor did not.

  By expanding the menu further, I found an Invite tab. It showed a list of two options: Tendua Scout, Level 35 and Nightpanther Juvenile, Level 45. I invited them both by pressing the Invite button by their names.

  The big cat did nothing as a violet screen appeared before its nose, but Feather gave a little squeak, her eyes crossing. “Omigoddess! What’s that?”

  “The party invite,” I explained.

  She waved her hand in front of her face, probably trying to dislodge her own hovering screen. “How are you doing that?”

  I felt suddenly tired. “Just hit yes.”

  She went still, and then, with a shaking finger, she tapped the Accept button. An icon appeared in the corner of my screen to indicate that she had joined my party.

  “Does that… does that mean my spirit journey has officially begun?” she said, awed.

  Fuck You Dave: Second-to-last Riftguard dead. Won’t be long now.

  “I don’t know about that, but we had better get going,” I told Feather. “There are several people chasing me, and they’re… far less friendly.”

  She nodded. “Okay. Go get your buddy, and go on ahead of me, then.”

  I didn’t like that idea any more the second time she proposed it. “Won’t your people shoot at me?” I asked. “If they see me before they see you?”

  “I told you,” she said. “We’re pacifists.”

  I met eyes with the panther. “Yeah, but he isn’t.”

  Feather planted her spear and held a hand out to the panther. “But Flower’s a good kitty. Aren’t you, Flower?”

  Flower ignored her. He showed his fangs, growling louder.

  Well… this is gonna be fun.